Dealing With Infidelity

After The Affair (Infidelity)

When your partner has been unfaithful, a lot of things can happen. Your world can become chaotic. Nothing looks or feels the same. Initial shock often turns to anger, and questions arise within you:

  • Why?
  • How could it happen?
  • How did I miss it?
  • Did I cause it to happen?
  • Is it really possible to put the past behind us?
  • Can I ever trust my partner again?

Dealing with infidelity is never easy – it is one of the most difficult challenges to any relationship. Many of your deepest questions can only be answered by the partner who has had the affair. Yet, the one who had the affair often finds openness difficult, and he or she can be overwhelmed by the shame and the profound hurt that they see they have caused in their partner’s eyes.

Recovering From An Affair (Infidelity)

Recovering from an affair is possible.  Many couples do.  Infidelity can mean the end of the relationship, but it doesn’t have to.  You have options, even if you don’t see them all right now.

Couples counselling is essential to helping couples talk through their situation and to find a way forward to help repair and rebuild their relationship in a meaningful way.  Make sure you work with a therapist who believes that recovery is possible (like many friends, many therapists don’t), who bases that belief on a track record of actually helping couples in this area, and who has the skills and training to recognize and cope with the powerful underlying issues that created the situation, not just the surface symptoms.

Recovering is difficult, uncomfortable, yet at the same time meaningful work.  Dr. Ottawa believes that it is one of the most important, life changing work that individuals in their lifetime can do.   It will bring peace of mind and well-being for you and your relationship and for all those who are touched by it.

Six Ways Couples Counselling Can Help

After an affair, couples seek counselling for a variety of different reasons.

  • To put to rest those questions that won’t go away until they’ve surface and been dealt with.
  • To understand their actions, their reactions to themselves and each other.
  • To regain equilibrium, rebuild confidence and heal. (The emotional rollercoaster is normal, and yes it will get better)
  • To discover that couples DO have choices and how to keep anger and pain from dictating those choices or their future.
  • To look to their future using the past as a tool to make them stronger, so they can each come out a better person no matter what path they chose in their relationship
  • To repair and rebuild their relationship in a meaningful way.

Whatever your questions and your specific situation, please know that recovery is possible and that you can reach out for counsel and assistance.  We invite you to call to our office at 780-991-5117 and get your questions answered or make a confidential appointment with Dr. Ottawa.

Words can’t express my gratitude to all the help and counseling you provided us during this difficult time in our lives. I wanted to sincerely thank-you for helping save our marriage.  You are a difference maker and its important that you know you had such an impact on our lives. Thanks again. R.B.

Since we first sought Dr. Easingwood’s help we have made significant progress toward the goals we set for ourselves. This is largely due to her questioning technique, guidance and insightful comments. We would certainly recommend New Start Counselling to other individuals or couples who require professional counselling for relationship issues. H.H.

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